Okay, First of all, I would like to make a disclaimer. I would like to say that the words that would follow MAY not be entirely true. These things are entirely based on what I THINK and could not be true for what others think or experience/d.
Okay, as the title says, Why do Jerks (by this i mean: Playboy, Mayabang, Mayaman) most of the time GET the Girl. Guys like me always thought of this. (By ‘Guys like me’ , I meant : Hopless romantics, torpe, the shy type, not a jerk, and always believe that we should treat girls with respect. The typical nice, Boy-next-door type). Now this is just based on observation but Most of the time, may it be at Movies, High School, College, and even when you get to work, guys like me don’t stand a chance against Jerks who take girls for granted (given that you could already compete in the looks and personality dept.). We all get stuck on the Friendzone and wonder why it happens. Just to find out that at the end of that relationship, the girl that we like/liked just got hurt by the Jerk that they chose in the first place. then they would complain that “all guys are the same” or “why does this always happen to me” and all other things that i did not mention. Then we all say to ourselves “Why did she not just pick me in the first place?? I’m not like that. She could have had a good time with me.”
This is because of one thing: The Fear of Rejection. Whenever a guy Genuinely likes a girl (by this i mean: the kind of LIKE that would eventually lead to LOVE), He wants everything to be perfect. He does not want to mess up a single thing when pursuing that girl. Lets say for example: Sending a Text message. Now, the Friendzone guys would worry about a lot of factors:
•time of day
•what the girl would think his motive would be
•the girls mood at the time
•message content, and
•what the girl would reply after the message.
•The first other factors for the last factor
Right after that, they end up not texting the girl at all because of thinking about a lot of things. now the Jerks would probably just worry about one thing:
The Friendzone guy would worry so much that he would screw up. that is why he would put a lot of factors in his mind in order for everything to go smooth just for that one special girl. They even do research first. The thing is, most things do not happen the way it is planned. So when at least one of the factors go wrong, it all falls apart one by one because of how we loyally stick to the plan. at the end, we are not so smooth and the girl did not see that factor that she was looking for: Being Interesting .
Now the Jerk would not worry at all (maybe a little) and he does not have factors or any of that stuff. But nonetheless, he worries about minimal things. He follows the the saying “There are a lot of fish in the sea”. so if he screws this up, he just moves on to his next prospect. if he does catch her, it’s what he eats for dinner (figuratively). and being spontaneous is what makes him interesting for the girls even though his fellings are not genuine.
So basically,The Friendzone guys want to catch THE fish in the sea and the jerks want to catch ANY fish in the sea as long as it fits their needs.
So there you go. that is what i think. The fear of rejection makes us all so worried that we don’t make a move at all.
Just wished that Girls would know the reason behind this also. haha. If a guy becomes Torpe, of very shy in front of you compared to others, he may genuinely like you. either that or he’s just a nerd who never had experience with girls AT ALL.
It takes a lot of courage to get what/who we want in life. that would mean a lot of difficulties and errors along the way. don’t be afraid of rejection as it is a part of life. One cannot climb to the top without coming from the bottom and having a few tumbles in his journey.